Sweet Surprises on...

Wordless Wednesday :o)

Seeking Joy

I am in a season in my life where I've found that I need to seek joy. I need to search for peace and beauty. I need to physically capture my thoughts and wrestle them back to the things that I can change, the people I can encourage, the lives I can touch. It's an odd season for me. Smiles that used to flow so naturally I now often need to force, laughter that used to hover on the surface of my emotions now needs to be cranked up as an anchor from the deep, joking and teasing have turned to quiet observation. But I am still seeking, I will keep searching, and I will keep wrestling....I will.

Because this little guy needs me to.

What a gift he is in my life...Have I told you that lately, J? Have I told you how when I look at you, I can physically see God's love for me smiling back.

How many women have spent a lifetime hoping, praying, and dreaming for such a gift?

God has blessed me so abundantly. May my eyes always be open to the beautiful family he has given me, my amazing husband and son, my dear friends. It's so easy to be robbed of that focus...to lose sight of the blessings right in front of us.

We've had a discouraging week this week. I did a lot of research and checking with several adoption boards and other agencies and have learned that there is a problem with our adoption that was confirmed today. Where this leaves us, I don't know. There is a little boy far away, that I love all my heart, mind, and soul. With desperation, I have been clinging to the hope that he would be home soon but it appears that this may not be the case. Hopefully, we'll hear more news soon and I'll keep you all posted, but for now I am afraid that I must wait, pray, and keep seeking, searching, capturing, and wrestling my thoughts back to the things that I can change, the people I can encourage, the lives I can touch. Thank you for all who have been lifting us up through this time. We are so grateful.

*UPDATE* We have not lost our referral for E.! I'm sorry, I did not mean for what I wrote to be read that way. We just now know that there is a definite cause for our delay and that we need to wait for it to be fixed before we can move forward.

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God." Matthew 4:21

Wordless Wednesday

WWWF???

One thing I never thought I'd hear a physician prescribe......wrestling!

J is officially 100% back in the game and doing great. At his follow-up appointment, his doctor ordered that he was to go home and run- if that went well, then the next night was wrestling with Dad, and, if symptom free, he'd be given the clearance to return to his full regime of swim, hockey, and soccer.

Well, J thought this was the best news ever! A Doctor mandated wrestle session...talk about a little boy's dream prescription! He was giddy about it all day and literally pounced on D the moment he walked in the door! (Poor D really took a beating too!)

I just hovered in the background, snapped pictures, and kept a constant running dialog of "be careful, watch his head, J don't hurt your father!" ;o)

Pause.....Pupil check. Any stars?

Nope...

& back on. Boys are so strange!? ;o)

On a non-athletic note....J and I have had a packed schedule with a trip to the symphony, a field trip to the local orchards, a new (IEW) writing class with our HS group, and co-op. As a family, we've gone to a football game & coffee with friends, met with our life team, and even enjoyed a fabulous lunch at our local Ethiopian restaurant. (YUM!!) It's been a packed week.

On a personal note...this wait is starting to take its toll on me. For a while, I was holding it together pretty well, even though my thoughts were often elsewhere, on a brown eyed boy in Ethiopia to be exact. But now, I'm starting to drop the ball. My normally type A, calendar driven, over-organized life is starting to crack in pathetic manners. This week alone I was a day late on a library book (I know, gasp! But it gets worse), I totally forgot (got the reminder call and then forgot!) my cat's vet appointment, and then, earlier today, I told my girlfriend I would meet her after swim lessons to assist with a lesson issue (I coordinate the swim lessons for our homeschool group) and totally ditched her! Got my son changed and was halfway home before it dawned on me that I had forgotten!!! Some of my girlfriends used to tease me and had nicknamed me Monica (after the Friends show), but now I'm afraid Phoebe would be the more accurate fit. Sigh...tell me I'm not alone here! At least with pregnancy I had hormones to blame.....adoption? Will all revert back once we have good news and are out of this cycle of hope & disappointment?

Anyway...that's where I'm at this week. No new news on a court date. There have been quite a few assigned to our agency and they are hopeful that they'll receive one for us soon. But from what we can tell, the dates as of last week were already pushed out to mid November, so by now we could easily be looking at late Nov. to early Dec. just for our hearing. It's not a happy picture, I'm afraid. I'm trying to trust and not lose heart....but it's hard.

Sending Love,

Phoebe ;o)

Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you.....lalalaaalalalaaa

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps." Proverbs 16:9

Books, Books, Books....

Let's chat about books.

I have read some incredibly life changing books lately. Books that have touched me to my soul and left me changed. Books that are so powerful that I can't help but ponder the what-ifs they have caused to swirl through my thoughts. What if everyone read this book, "There is No Me Without You" by Melissa Fay Greene? What would our world look like? Would it end some ignorance and ignite a compassion like never before? What could that mean for the nations in Africa? India? North America? If people in this world were moved by compassion instead of greed and self fulfillment. What would it mean for the children?

This book took me through a journey of knowledge, pain, joy....it exposed the selfishness in my own life and made me uncomfortable, but I am so glad I read it!

I am currently reading and almost through Silent Tears by Kay Bratt. This book will cause you to lose sleep at night. It is a journal of an amazing woman's life and her efforts to bring love into the heartbreaking realm of one of China's orphanages. It is not a piece of fiction and is written with raw honesty. I can only handle small portions of this book at a time......

Next on my bookshelf is It's Not Okay With Me, by Janine Maxwell. I've heard really good things about it and am looking forward to dusting it off and giving it's spine some stretching. I'll let you know what I think :o)

So.....that is what I've been up to lately while hanging out at J's many athletic practices. There once was a time when I only read the Bible & fiction and don't get me wrong I still love to snuggle in the puff rocker and tackle a Henderson or Chaikin.....but as of late my heart has been drawn to learn. Learn and then Pray.

On a much lighter note...we just received our Blurb book in the mail and it turned out beautiful! We are so incredibly pleased! The honest low-down....the spine is a glue binding, so I do have concerns that the end pages may not always remain attached and some of the pictures printed darker then they appeared on the blog. But overall, we are delighted with the quality of the paper used, the clarity with the photos, and that two precious years of our son's childhood are now captured in print. :o)

*E. Update: The courts have re-opened and last week our agency received five court dates. Our family was not one of them, but we are hoping and praying that we'll hear something soon.

"Sing to God, sing praise to his name, extol him who rides on clouds--his name is the Lord-- and rejoice before him. A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families," Psalm 68:4-5

It's the 14th.....

....and our precious boy turns 11 months old today.

I pray he is kissed and snuggled in loving arms.

"Trust in him at all times, O People; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge." Psalm 62: 8

Life....

Reader's Advisory: It's a LOOONNNGGGG one folks! ;o)

Life has been full this week with a lot of good, a bunch of normal, and some down right scary happenings. We have finished long awaited projects, enjoyed time with friends, spent a lot of time in prayer, and a lot of time being thankful.

Earlier this weekend and after months of chipping away at it, I finally finished and published our blog book with blurb. So glad to have that one off my shoulders! I'm really excited to see how it turns out and will let you all know! It ended up being 196 pages, 1009 photos, full color, hardbound with a photo wrap cover and came to @$67. I'm so delighted to know that no matter how time embraces the internet and blogger, that we will always have this story. Our children's story of how God has so blessed our family with little feet and a home filled with love.

We also have added a couple precious frames to our portrait wall in the dining room. Now if only the center one held a family of four and the upper and lower some mommy and daddy shots with our precious E. ....it would be perfect. Soon I pray.....(B, I hope you're ready for another photo shoot when our babe comes home!!!) :o)

We had a huge scare earlier this week when J received a mild concussion while playing a game of tag with his friends at co-op. He tripped over one of the kids and hit his temple in just the wrong place. Definitely not an experience I ever want to relive again! But we are so thankful that he's 100% back to his normal bouncy self and D and I have been on observation overdrive trying to keep him calm and restful. It's like controlling the tide, peeps! This kid is energy personified. I blame my MIL.... I'm convinced at some hair pulling moment 25 years ago, she prayed that D would someday experience having a child just like him....and here we are now, energy, mischief and concussions. Thanks a lot L! hee hee...jk *wink* (D was a division one hockey goalie for those of you scratching your head wondering about concussions...) Umm....so where was I ;o)

Control...so J has been ordered to a week of rest and I must confess, I've been enjoying the extra family time immensely! We've played board games, snuggled and watched movies, put together new lego sets....it's been a nice break from the normal manic pace of racing from one sport to the next. Only next time, I prefer we just take a vacation at home and skip of the whole ER bit.

We'll find out on Tuesday when he can return to his full fledged normal activities. Hopefully, sooner than later as we had one sad little camper when his daddy went to help coach his team's hockey game and he couldn't attend :o(

I am soooo happy to report that we are past the stinky part of J's science labs! Yikes, that was bad for a while...really, really bad!

We put together a special frame for J.

J: Mom, we need to go buy frames.

M: Frames? What do we need frames for?

J: For my wall!

M: Why do you need frames for your wall??

J: (With the 8 yr-old-duh-mom inflection in his voice) So I can have pictures of E. on my wall, of course!!!

M: (Still a bit slow....) You want pictures of E. on your wall?

J: (Totally exasperated now) Of course! I've waited a LONG time to have a brother!!!

M: Oh, of course we can go get you frames. :o)

How cute is that?!

So we found this little frame at Walmart and J really liked the idea of doing two of each of them and making it a "brother's" frame. He's so proud of E. and is so looking forward to being his big brother....we all NEED our boy home!

We've collected acorns and found woolly friends :o)

J's been forming a little colony at the base of our dogwood tree...it's been fascinating to me that they were actually staying there!

And I will end this post with a huge praise that has been weighing on our hearts. A dear friend's daughter has been hospitalized and battling with some unknown and very scary medical condition this past week. Her daddy is deployed and it has just been a living nightmare for their family. Well, the docs finally seem to have figured things out and we are just praising God and so grateful that she is on the mend! Please say a prayer for this family....one of praise and one for continued healing! God is good.....

I hope you all are having a beautiful and fun filled Columbus Day weekend!

Smiles and Hugs, M~

"Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked. For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless. O Lord Almighty blessed is the man who trusts in you." Psalm 84:10-12